It’s been a minute.
Everything is so heavy. Back breaking, dry heaving, falling over my own two feet difficult. I fuck up a lot. The decision making part of my brain has been absent for quite some time. I don’t know who I am a lot of the time, but that’s okay. I don’t think anyone really knows who they are. We are all just pretending to be whatever image we have in our minds of who we should be rather than just b e i n g. That’s okay, though. I’m trying so hard to not be selfish anymore, and give and love more than I ever have. I just really fucking love everything, man. Maybe too much, but who cares. I swear the first boyfriend I ever have will suffocate from my love. See, the love I have is selective. The many facets of myself stitch together to form this human quilt. Wrap yourself up in me, maybe the quilt will be soft, or it could be scratchy. Just please don’t wash me.